I Don’t Like Chai: a listicle

Dear Reader,

As a millennial, I have read quite a bit of listicles. While I love to take a quiz that can guess my age based on my favorite type of cheese, I prefer to read through short bursts of writing that can instantly connect me with others. The desire to belong has become so easy with the internet, and I like knowing that others practice phone calls before they make them, or pronounce “Wednesday” as “Wed-nes-day” in their heads as they read. So, as an homage, here is a listicle of things about me.

 

1. I am a newlywed.

I got married in October 2018 to my college love. He is a kind man who understands me as a woman, a teacher, and a human.

2. Most of my favorite foods are the same as a five year old.

Every time I tell my kindergarteners that I like macaroni and cheese, mashed potatoes, and chocolate, they all furiously nod their heads in agreement. I leave out the fact that I also love coffee and wine.

3. I consider myself an extroverted introvert.

I took one of those personality tests a few years ago that told me I was approximately 50% extrovert and 50% introvert. First impressions suggest that I am bubbly, outgoing, sassy. Lifelong friends know I have a little social anxiety, phone anxiety, life anxiety. My mind, like many, feels like 52 internet tabs are open at once, like I am living another life inside my head.

4. In another life, I believe I was/will be a writer.

I don’t actually know what I believe about other lives, but my mother always said these words to me when I was a little girl. I have always loved to write – as a student, as a moody teen working through some things, as a college student sharing a piece with my now husband, and now as a teacher of writing.

5. I do not like chai tea.

I liked that part of my last name and part of my occupation made the name of an artisan drink. It’s clever. I appreciate a good pun – hopefully someone finds this corniness relatable the way a meme might speak to you.

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